Okay so now I've reached the point in my blog where I can't proceed without discussing titles. Which is sad for me because titles are NOT my favorite subject! lol
I've read enough blogs and websites to know the "proper" way to write things. I know the rules, for example, about capitalizing anything that has to do with the capital D Dominant and using small letters for anything that has to do with the submissive. I know that most bloggers who are subs refer to their Doms as "Sir" or "Master". But umm yeah this is where I run into trouble.
So yeah let's get this out there now: I have a hard time with titles. They make me squirm and wince and sigh and moan and groan and getting the dreaded M... word past my lips is next to impossible! (Yet...I'd better not make that sound like it's set in stone because my beloved Dom has other ideas on the topic and I learned the hard way this summer that he means business...but again that's a topic for another post!)
Anyway, for the time being at least, I hope you, dear reader, shall forgive me for taking some liberties when I discuss my partner in this journey into kink. For now, at least, I'm going to completely bypass the evil M... word and equally repugnant s... word that goes along with it. Even the idea of typing them makes me shudder lol. Although my Dom seems to enjoy calling me "sla...." yeah you get the picture. Excuse me while I go hide under the bed for a while now lol.
I do know that the terms Dom and sub are general and that it's considered respectful of one's Dom to use a title in the BDSM community but I plead newbie status and assure you all that I mean no disrespect! Titles are just a hangup of mine at the moment so it will be something to work toward in the future. (And I can assure you that my beloved Dom has plans to do so)
In the meantime, I'll be using "S" to refer to my sweet Dom. :)
My friend (from slaveduties),
ReplyDeleteTitles can take a long while to adjust too. Master gave me the choice when to start calling Him Master. And the proper etiquette only applies IF your Master wishes them too; mine does not but i like too at times so...
Anyhow, the only thing I had to call Master was Sir in the beginning. This was easy since I call every male that due to manners. When He wanted me to switch to Master, He let me fluctuate between Sir and Master until I was ready to totally switch over. Maybe that would help?
And just wait until yours wants to use "slut, bitch, His whore, etc" and other such terms of endearment...it will take awhile to adjust to each new one..trust me
Ohmygosh thank you SO much for your comment!!! :) You're my first! Yay!
ReplyDeleteIt really does help to know that I'm not alone in struggling with this. I feel so conflicted about it! I see the people on slaveduties saying "Master" and "slave" like it's nothing and I wonder if it always came so easily.
It's good to know that it's not just me who struggles! I think maybe it's partially because I take the title so very seriously. I have NEVER called anyone that (well except for the one night with my darling Dom lol when I really wasn't given a choice and my ass hasn't been quite the same since then). To me, it feels like if I do ever call someone that, it's a complete act of submission on my part. A giving of every part of myself. Sometimes I even mean to say it but it just kinda freezes in my throat and no matter what I do, it just won't come out!
At this point, all I can easily manage is a somewhat flippant "ya boss". Even "Sir" is hard. On occasion, I manage one of those, but it's not frequent. That usually happens when S. is being all strict with me and telling me how it is and it just seems appropriate to respond with "Yessir". I guess the more dominant he is, the more submissiveness he brings out in me.
I'll just keep working on it. Thanks again so much for the comment! :)